tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74500593264794446412011-04-21T17:16:28.304-04:00Charming and fabulous. That's me.The Secretarynoreply@blogger.comBlogger401100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-16771138455641757242008-09-15T16:07:00.002-04:002008-09-15T16:18:11.557-04:00

So yeah, it's been awhile, yet again. My excuse? None. Angry, bored, apathetic. I'm done here at my job. I have no responsibilities now. I am the office maid. I refused to go to the birthday celebration for September today because I knew they would all sit there waiting for me to serve them. Would they be surprised that all I really want to do is shove the cake in their faces? I ordered

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-2608094251694628362008-07-14T09:41:00.002-04:002008-07-14T09:46:35.328-04:00

So I had my meeting with HR and it was exactly like I thought - didn't want to hear anything I felt or thought (in fact told me my "feelings" were wrong!) so I never mentioned a word about mobbing or anything. It was very clear to me that they wanted to conversation to lean towards the PHB being a bad leader. This pissed me off, yes he may need some additional skills, but pointing the finger at

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-66289387798282994132008-06-25T13:13:00.002-04:002008-06-25T13:16:31.633-04:00

I did some research yesterday at work and was trying to figure out exactly how work was making me feel and I was really surprised to find out that it's a form of bullying. When people do what they can to undermine you, take credit for what you do and it's constant and consistent. Also when they get other people to take it on with them to form a group of bullies. There was a word for this too,

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-29558385671469728592008-06-24T10:15:00.005-04:002008-06-24T10:32:34.914-04:00

You know, I'm really getting kind of bitter about this. When my nemesis left this office, my days were supposed to be getting better. Much much better. Joy and happiness abound. I had images of skipping down the hallways and breaking out into spontanious song and dance. You know, like Grease. Or maybe something like 9 to 5 with a Dolly Parton special guest appearance.So, well, this has not

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-55404655863405444932008-06-23T13:08:00.003-04:002008-06-23T13:22:44.652-04:00

When I was little I would ask my step-father tons of questions: why, where, when, how... etc. Whenever he got tired of answering he would ask me back if I was writing a novel. I would always say no until I thought I was smarter than he was and one day I said yes, I am writing a novel! Ever so proudly I lifted my chin as if to say, so there! And his response: make this one a mystery. Oh my

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-81246477882993575512008-06-17T07:09:00.003-04:002008-06-17T07:15:37.774-04:00

So yes, I did have a great day yesterday. Even finding out what I'm about to say, I still had a really good day knowing that the person who gives me the most greif is now gone. She leaves earthquakes as she goes, however. I had a meeting yesterday with HR, PHB and a couple others to determine how to fill a vacant admin position and we find out that Esmerelda told the Esther that she can have

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-41145490430978058982008-06-16T07:25:00.001-04:002008-06-16T07:25:59.624-04:00

Another reason to vote Democrat this year:

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-78669309840493152462008-06-16T07:15:00.002-04:002008-06-16T07:21:40.863-04:00

I am actually glad to go to work today. It's true! Today is the first day of the rest of my happy work life. I keep singing "ding dong the bitch is gone" in my head and I smile and flit about my house getting ready just like Cinderella with her mice buddies. (I know it's a different fairy tale than Oz, but work with me here.) I figure if anything goes wrong today, it must be my own fault.

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-30499344207355557912008-06-11T06:05:00.003-04:002008-06-11T06:11:05.632-04:00

Yes, Esmerelda that wicked witch, is finally gone on Friday. We have mostly "made up" with each other. Meaning I just ignore her outburts and do internal chants: "four more days... three more days" etc. I'm being so nice to her face I feel like to world's largest hypocrite. I wonder if I will be able to squeeze out some tears to say goodbye on Friday. I'm not so sure. I pulled together a

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-90209948633471135082008-06-02T07:10:00.002-04:002008-06-02T07:20:07.888-04:00

Ok, it's Monday, I have gotten up and showered and what do I discover? Yes, while planting in the garden this weekend I have been totally chewed to peices. Bitten by black flies and other bugs all over. I am so itchy, it's crazy. I am putting benadryl cream on as we speak. Let's hope it works.Ok, now I need some feedback. I am a bridesmaid in my friend's wedding. She chose her matron of

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-78764997602768493262008-05-30T12:54:00.002-04:002008-05-30T13:05:27.047-04:00

I am currently preparing for my zen moment this weekend. I have gone to the garden center and bought myself a bunch of lovely flowers and border green stuff to plant this weekend and I can't wait. It will probably rain and I don't even care. I haven't had any chance to garden this year yet and I am missing it so much that I am going to go hog wild tomorrow. I will be digging in the dirt and

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-43367966991405805582008-05-29T17:55:00.002-04:002008-05-29T17:58:03.358-04:00

Ok so maybe I overreacted. I was all ready for my boss to let me down, and actually he didn't. At least not so far. All I know is said email was gone from his inbox this afternoon and nary a word was said to me. So maybe he actually stood up for me and told them to lump it. Wow. I almost feel good thinking that's what he did. I'm so hormonal. LOL!

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-35608968450075487652008-05-29T12:39:00.002-04:002008-05-29T12:43:56.317-04:00

I am pretty sure you should never blog when you're angry, but I don't know where to turn and I am furious, yet again. I just found out that there are a few people in the office who are actually trying to take a portion of my job responsibility away. I know exactly why, too. It's because I "caught" them doing something wrong and corrected them, so now they are trying to say it's a confidential

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-49820208579104452012008-05-27T10:35:00.006-04:002008-05-27T11:34:29.464-04:00

I know it's been a real long time since I wrote last. So many things have happened, I am not sure where to begin.I guess I should start off with the most happy news of all - Esmerelda is leaving! Ding Dong the witch is (almost) gone! WaaaHOOOOO! We have had nothing but strife between us, and even most recently I discussed her terrible behavior with folks above me, and then when she got

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-58343004704174444372008-01-10T09:53:00.000-05:002008-01-10T12:09:11.226-05:00

I don't know about you, but I can't beleive 2008 is upon us! I had a fabulous vacation - two weeks and a couple days and was back to work last Thursday, whereupon I immediately developed migraines. What does that say to you? I am such a slave to my paycheck and I'm trying not to be bummed being back to work, but the shit already started flying as soon as I got back, leaving my head pounding

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-10735543414059000992007-12-12T15:05:00.000-05:002007-12-12T15:43:46.697-05:00

I know, it's rare that I can say I am so very happy here at work, but I finally got the good news - I'm getting a salary increase! This is exciting because it is for my role as office manager and I think I'm getting almost 5% increase, which is before our regular merit raise increase that happens in May, of which I will get my usual 3% no matter what kind of job I do. So yeah, I'm totally

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-73246130923170080552007-12-10T10:58:00.000-05:002007-12-10T11:51:30.974-05:00

I haven't blogged lately, trying to get ready for the 2 week vacation coming up at the end of December and dealing with the usual office crapola. Here's the latest news:1. Barney gave his notice. Of course he decided the best way to do so was to yell and scream at our PHB. I don't know about you, but no matter what, I don't yell at the office. I'd like to think I have enough self-control.

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-71469123330139332192007-11-27T10:44:00.000-05:002007-11-27T11:54:45.743-05:00

So I made it through Thanksgiving. Feeling a fat these days, but I just bought some new bras, so at least my breasts are perky, even if the buttons on my pants no longer latch. As usual, the staff here (who are the most ungrateful group of people I have ever met) are bent on complaining and whining. Last year I organized a Thanksgiving potluck. I don't know too many companies who even

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-5711317130046441182007-11-20T12:57:00.000-05:002007-11-20T13:09:23.760-05:00

Ok, ladies out there, I need your support. This is the most ridiculous thing, but anyway, here goes...We have a cleaning service that the landlord of our building has arranged to clean our main working areas, and their own maintenance guy is to clean the bathrooms and kitchen. This is a relatively new arrangement, and so far, at least for me, it's not working out too well. First off, the

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-50752325630216685372007-11-12T15:54:00.000-05:002007-11-12T16:02:54.651-05:00

I've been arranging for the entire staff to take an offsite trip (across the Canadian border even) and I have everything all finalized. Of course, there is always the occasional whine (do I have to sit near so-and-so?, etc.). So I had arranged for a couple of minivans, set up the drivers and gave them lists of who sits in what vehicle (so no one gets left behind). One guy here (I'll call him

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-46072235513594498732007-11-09T08:38:00.000-05:002007-11-09T09:12:15.519-05:00

Sometimes I have these visions and I don't know if I should be scared or amused, but mostly, right now, I'm amused. These visions are quite bloody and involve me slicing and dicing various female co-workers. It's quite Freddy Kruegger (sp?) of me, really. I'd love to have the long fingernail blades. That way, when they piss me off all I have to do is flick a finger in their general direction.

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-13819087905216312802007-11-05T08:23:00.000-05:002007-11-05T09:13:42.050-05:00

I think I'm a fairly observant person. I'm aware of my surroundings, of people around me. Sometimes it astonishes me how oblivious people can be. This weekend I drastically changed my haircolor. You can't miss it. I was blond and now I'm auburn. Esmerelda just walked by me, looked me in the eye and didn't even notice. Hmmmm.... I suppose there is the possibility that I look like shit and

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-2092183161914403142007-10-25T10:04:00.000-04:002007-10-25T10:13:45.527-04:00

One of my very many pet peeves is with this one guy here (we'll call him Forest Gump cuz he stutters like him) who always beckons people via email. You can be sitting at your desk all day long and only 15 feet away from his doorway and instead of getting up to speak to you he will send you an email that says "come see me". What? Come see you? Fuck you. I am so NOT coming to see you. Ok,

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-18491689314128363662007-10-25T07:27:00.000-04:002007-10-25T07:28:34.000-04:00

I can't view these at work, but I wanted to post it on my blog anyway, mostly because it's so damn funny. I hope you enjoy:

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-56421589012296398012007-10-24T11:51:00.000-04:002007-10-24T12:06:53.940-04:00

I've just discovered that Esmerelda and Esther are taking a week vacation together over the Thanksgiving holiday. They've disguised their lesbian love getaway by saying their husbands are coming along, but I'm starting to see the light. I'm only sad that they're not hot lesbians. At least I could get in some good fantasy time while I daydream. Instead my mind rebels when I think of the

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-24095554719077106452007-10-23T16:22:00.000-04:002007-10-23T16:28:31.663-04:00

The moments that I think I am so very amazing seem to be the moments when there is always someone being a thorn in my side as well. Example: to enter my office building security we need to have badges. To go to other offices we need to have photo badges. I called our tech department and they will not make my sattelite office any badges so I think to myself, I will make some on my own for the

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-64972768921321404112007-10-18T15:50:00.000-04:002007-10-18T16:04:46.543-04:00

I'm afraid this blog is going to turn into the place where all I do is complain because I am sooooo fired up once again. Ok so this is the story this week. As you may know, National Boss' Day was this week, and I had a staff meeting to ask the staff if they would like to participate in doing something as a group. I pre-empted the meeting with an email, letting staff know I was going to be

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-20312431517154669992007-10-03T14:54:00.000-04:002007-10-03T15:15:37.672-04:00

I know many people complain about software, and in particular, Miscrosoft software, but I have to tell you that I really like it. I am currently "checked back in" to my job and am giving it a good go to stay here. This could be due to the pending raise I may be getting soon, who knows, but I'm putting my best foot forward, dressing better and voluntarily - yes that's right! - voluntarily doing

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-91949391435846655922007-09-18T14:49:00.000-04:002007-09-25T11:50:02.284-04:00

It's mid-year review time. Always a joy for everyone. Things are so very backwards. First of all, it doesn't matter how well you do, if you have busted your ass all year round, the merit increases are already decided in the budget even BEFORE your review is done. You could have saved the earth from pending destruction and it wouldn't matter. You're only getting the standard cost of living

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-58719349495140907942007-09-10T14:39:00.000-04:002007-09-10T14:49:19.571-04:00

There is a rampant mistrust in the office. We're going through one of those "cultural" changes where all the Big Wigs tell the Little Guy to reinvent the atmosphere (I assume that means it's so bad, they PhD's can't think of any solutions so pass it off to the "less than qualified" to find their own solutions). The problem is that the Little Guys are not empowered to make the changes necessary,

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-14362752953200740252007-08-31T11:34:00.000-04:002007-08-31T11:39:52.954-04:00

I sit right outside my boss' office, not close to anyone, not bothering anything. Someone has actually complained to my boss that they do not like it when I file my nails. I'm totally flabbergasted. "Someone" has too much time on their hands if they are noticing when I file or not file. I don't think I will ever understand people. Especially people like that. I said to my boss "is my work

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-70911922437965117022007-08-30T09:00:00.000-04:002007-08-30T09:12:29.881-04:00

Something happened yesterday that infuriated me so much, I couldn't even write about it until I cooled off a bit. Man was I steamed. As a secretary, you must know that what is on my desk is mine. It's not for you to touch, or take and if I have to put my friggen name on it to keep it out of your hands, I will. Know what I mean? Don't touch my favorite pen, don't ask me for a stapler or tape.

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-70988446016170046662007-08-27T11:35:00.000-04:002007-08-27T11:37:56.735-04:00

Pet Peeve: When the boss says stuff like "why don't we buy a can opener for the office" what he really means is "why don't YOU buy a can opener for the office." Say what you mean, mean what you say.

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-68308262251596683182007-08-27T11:04:00.000-04:002007-08-27T11:32:42.300-04:00

Yes, it's true, I'm a Big Brother fan. I've been watching since season 3 and while I don't get into it as much as some of the internet fans do, I still have my moments where I have to say "What the Hell America!!!!".First off, I'd like to tell CBS that this show is NOT the Donato show. No matter what you have listed on my cable information page. (Seriously, it says "Daniele Donato Dick Donato,

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-64266469142696843602007-08-21T16:17:00.000-04:002007-08-21T16:49:25.004-04:00

I know men that gossip, but women are the worst. Especially in an office. Seems like you can tell someone a secret one minute and the next minute you're hearing the same secret from someone else, only this time in a negative tone. This is driving me crazy. I've decided to turn this around to work in my favor. From now on if I want someone to know something that I can't really talk about, I'm

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-10901767231148529132007-08-15T15:01:00.000-04:002007-08-15T15:07:32.150-04:00

My boss (I like to refer to him as PHB - Pointy Headed Boss from Dilbert) goes past my desk, mostly like towards the bathroom. Another guy walks up and says where is PHB, I gesture with my chin "thataway". So he saunters off in that direction and my mind starts to wander.... is he actually going to track down PHB in the men's room? And if so, how do you maintain your dignity while holding

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-22161333579037010922007-08-15T09:29:00.000-04:002007-08-15T09:37:02.211-04:00

Girl that I pretend to like, but really am hating more every day: "Oh My God how you are putting 3 creams in your coffee? Wow!"Me: "Ummmm... yeah" [thinking what the F is it to you]Her: "And how many sugars is that?"Me: "6"Her" "oh my god"Me: (as I pour 3 sugar packets onto a teaspoon, feeling as tho I have to justify myself...) "See it's just 2 teaspoon full. Not that much really" And

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-83850767685195813092007-08-13T16:04:00.000-04:002007-08-21T16:52:23.541-04:00

I went scouting to see who else had the same type of idea that I did. I'm thinking that we all do it to waste time at work. To bring some kind of some ounce of joy into our grueling servitude to daily life. Here's some other whiners just like me:http://psychoticsecretary.blogspot.com/http://angrysecretary.wordpress.com/http://strugglingsecretary.blogspot.com/http://

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-13367086202516279482007-08-13T13:43:00.000-04:002007-08-13T13:52:46.841-04:00

Ever want to know why some bosses think that their secretary is a miracle worker even when the rest of the staff knows she's full of shit? This is a total trade secret, so be sure to keep it to yourself. This is what I call the "Scotty Syndrome". You know, Star Trek, Mr. Scott, the ship's engineer always says the ship can't take any more, he's doing everything he can, yada yada, and yet, he

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450059326479444641.post-212095443041606132007-08-06T15:41:00.000-04:002007-08-06T16:29:47.750-04:00

Today is the day. I'm starting a Secret Secretary Society ("SSS"). Calling all secretaries (or if you must be PC, Administrative Assistants). Tell me about your boss, your co-workers, your machines that never work, the coffee you have to fetch for visitors or anything that just irks you about being an assistant. We all have so much to say...

The Secretarynoreply@blogger.com0