Monday, November 12, 2007

Gossip Mill

I've been arranging for the entire staff to take an offsite trip (across the Canadian border even) and I have everything all finalized. Of course, there is always the occasional whine (do I have to sit near so-and-so?, etc.). So I had arranged for a couple of minivans, set up the drivers and gave them lists of who sits in what vehicle (so no one gets left behind). One guy here (I'll call him Barney cuz he's cute for awhile then he annoys you, then you want to kill him) had already arranged to drive his own vehicle. That's fine, he just won't get reimbursed for mileage or gas, that's the deal. He goes into my PHB's office to say "rumor is that there is a problem with me driving" to which my boss said "you worked it out with my Secretary, right? Then no problem." When I go into my boss' office next he says to me "Did you give Barney a hard time about driving" to which I say "of course not, he already arranged that with me like a good boy, we're all square." PHB says Barney was just here asking. Which fired me up immediately. You and I both know it's those damn bitches starting rumors about me again. So I march my tight fanny on down the hall to Barney's office and I step in and say "Hey Barn, just wanted you to know that PHB asked me about the car situation, and as far as I'm concerned, you already arranged it with me and there is absolutely no problem, contrary to what you may have heard." Barney says, "well yeah I did hear something." And I say, "you gotta take that crap with a grain of salt, between me and you, I very rarely give a shit about anything here, so if you ever hear that I do, you can call that person a big fat liar." I smile sweetly and waltz away.

Gossipers get fucked. I'm onto you.


The Guv'ner said...

Agendas. People who have them are dangerous. I hope Barny peed in his pants quaking with fear at the SCARY SECRETARY. SHE IS ON TO YOU, BUSTER! :)

Also? The letters the word verification wants me to type are pogfart. HEE! :)

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

There are good and bad things about working from home for as long as I did and the gossip mill is one of those things that falls into both categories. It was tiresome, but if the rumors were about the right people (or I started them) they were delicious.