Thursday, January 10, 2008

Happy New Year

I don't know about you, but I can't beleive 2008 is upon us! I had a fabulous vacation - two weeks and a couple days and was back to work last Thursday, whereupon I immediately developed migraines. What does that say to you? I am such a slave to my paycheck and I'm trying not to be bummed being back to work, but the shit already started flying as soon as I got back, leaving my head pounding and medication bound both Thursday AND Friday nights. How dare work invade my Friday night!

With the new year here, I more than ever realize that I no longer work with people who I consider to be my friends. When I first started with this company, I really did feel happy to come to work every day, working with people I liked and who liked me, and now it's just dreadful. It's no wonder I've developed hard core migraines. I sit at my desk and do my job and I do not go to the other admins to chat at all. If they want to see me, they come to my desk. I will do my best to not offer to help anyone because this is the story of my first day back to work:

As previously stated, Barney had given his notice. He has two gals that work under him and one of those gals said to me that she really wanted Barney's job and that she felt she was qualified. I generally like this lady, so I gave her advise and told her that she should sit with her new supervisor and set up a job progression plan. That person will need to tell her what skills she needs to acquire to get that job, whether it be an online course, a seminar or further education and/or degrees, etc. Well apparently Barney had to give her a final review before he left the business for good and he went to my PHB and told him that SHE told Barney that I told her that PHB would never promote her. Which, of course, I never said and would never say to someone. PHB called me into his office to casually ask me if I had said that, but also let me know that she had told Barney that in confidence and not only was PHB not supposed to know, but I wasn't supposed to know either and couldn't confront either one of those people about it. Now this really pisses me off. Either she totally backstabbed and lied her ass off about me, or Barney did, just to fuck me a little as he went out the door. Either way, I can't even ask and man oh man I am just so sick and tired of people saying crap about me that I got my first migraine that night and had to go home and take a pill. I wish I could be one of those people who generally doesn't care - and I do try, I really do - but it's so hard to be in an office knowing that at any given moment someone is talking about you, or lying about something you said, and you have no power whatsoever to defend yourself or set things right.

So now my New Years Resolution is to remind myself repeatedly that no one here is my friend, even if they are nice to me for a moment in time. The moment never lasts. I put a picture on my desk of my real friends and it helps sometimes, but my very best friend lives so far away now. I need a girlfriend really bad. I have a couple girls that are friends, but really it's not the same connection as my very best friend who I miss terribly. I am making plans to visit her soon and it will be like refilling an empty well. I need some freakin girl love dammit! LOL! Anyway, you know what I mean. There's nothing in the world like a really good girlfriend, even if you do have a fabulous boyfriend or husband.

Ok that's enough babbling for the first blog of New Years. I hope everyone had a fabulous time (which I did, don't get me wrong, it's just the office that sucks, not my life!).

Best wishes!


The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

It sounds sad, but it's a really good bit of advice you gave yourself.

I've met some of my best friends at jobs I've had in the past, but the older I get the bigger the gap gets between friends and coworkers.

Ultimately you're there to perform a service in exchange for money.

I'm always try to be very gracious and friend-LY at work, but rarely give a toss if I make real friends with anyone. It's nice when I do make a friend, but I don't bank on it.

Happy New Year ;)

Teri said...

I find that there are no honest and worthwhile people to be friends with.

I'm very picky about who I let into my circle.

It's a shame that you can't even offer good, honest advice without it slapping you in the face.

Happy New Year.

The Guv'ner said...

I've gotten on with a lot of people at jobs but ultimately I've only stayed in touch with maybe three of them on a regular basis. And only one of those I am really close to. Ultimately anyone who actually REMINDS you of work, outside work, can never be good! :)

Ignore the idiots. You are working to live not the other way around.


the Secretary said...

Thanks ladies, your input is most welcome. I am sticking to just my job and not asking any personal questions. I can tell it's noticed.

People who have left this company who I thought were my friends now actually plan events - one to invite the other admins, and one for me separately. I'm like WTF? That's weird, even to me. It elevates my paranoia. LOL!